Self-respect > Keeping the peace
I posted a quick little Insta story the other night when I was hanging on my balcony watching the sunset over the mountains, and it got a lot of love and it seemed to resonate with people so I thought I'd expand on it here a little more.
My OG post was basically just how I was reflecting on the wild journey of personal growth, and how you can change your life and evolve, if you want to.
The summer is a pretty reflective time for me because I love my beach hangs, and road trips, and those two things give me a lot of time to just fucking think about life and reflect on where I'm at and how this year has unfolded so far... And it kinda hit me, that I've grown into a new version of me this year that feels very grounded. 🌊
Growth and evolution is fucking hard, and it requires so much trust in yourself to know what is right for you and what you’re not willing to tolerate anymore.
This has been a theme for me this year, apparently.
I’ve had a few moments this year where I put my cards on the table, hoping for a real conversation, and the response was… not what I’d hoped for. The first one hit me really hard, because I just didn't see it coming. The second time, it still stung, but I could see the pattern, and that made it easier to step back.
It's no fault of theirs, or mine, it's just life, and everyone's on their own journeys. ⛰️
As much as those situations sucked, I’ve come out of them feeling more confident and free. Five years ago, I didn’t have the capacity or skills to show up like that, to confront something & someone head on—I would’ve stayed quiet to keep the peace, at any cost. But now, I back myself.
When you choose yourself, you’ll lose people, sure—but what you gain in self-respect is worth so much fucking more than what you thought you needed to hang onto.
It's not worth the time or energy to spend so much time wishing things or people could be different, because all we can do is believe people when they show us who they are. And then decide for ourselves what we want to do about it.
I also realised a lot of what I’ve been reflecting on lately ties straight back to The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz—a solid-as-hell book I picked up again recently. I’d basically been living into these a lot more without realising it, and I can genuinely say this shit changes your life.
🎙️ Be impeccable with your word – say what you mean, mean what you say. And don't use your word against yourself, or others.
🤎 Don’t take anything personally – what people do is about them, not you. I struggle with this one sometimes, but it does help me get perspective on things when I just take a step back.
🌀 Don’t make assumptions – ask, clarify, don’t fill in the blanks with your own stories and spiralling thoughts.
🌲 Always do your best – whatever your “best” looks like today.
I stopped reading pretty much all self-help-ey books a few years ago (I literally have a full body 🤢 reaction to them now lol), but there's ones like this that are almost more in the spiritual realm that have stood the test of time and just never. get. old.
So yeah, this is where I'm at lately outside of my business & creative life: not chasing, not clinging, not overthinking.
Honestly, life feels a hell of a lot lighter when you stop taking everything so personally and quit focusing so much damn energy on what other people are doing with their lives. Just sticking to my own integrity & values, and letting life do its thing. Self-respect over everything else. 🤎
